Thursday, July 31, 2008

So I should be sleeping right now, but there is a group of about 10 noisy guys outside my house packing and leaving to go camping. Yes, they're leaving at midnight. Bah
I went to Guelph today with two friends that are gonna go there next year with me. And by next year I mean August 30th....
But it was really fun. We wandered around and chatted and looked for interesting stuff downtown. We found a really cool pictures place and some nice clothing shops, and a Bollywood Bistro, which we wanted to go to, but it was closed :(
It was fun to chill with them thought.
Because the times, they are a-changin'

Wednesday, July 30, 2008

Dang you horsie!

She went and messed up her leg. So camping will be difficult. It has been decided that horses don't like camping.

Anyway, I went to work today and whatnot. Nothing exciting really. Things didn't work, and I'm dead tired from tying to fix them. But w/e. I didn't do much deep thinking while on shift. Or maybe I did. But I don't remember it. A hundred or so times a day I think of something and I'm like OOH BLOG! but then I forget it. Upsetting.

I'm in a wonky mood today. You know the feeling when you've got a mad crush on someone and you just want to tell them, but you don't know if they like you, and you laugh at yourself because it feels like grade 8, but at the same time it's still there; scary and tingly and hopeful. I'm kinda feeling that right now, but I don't know why. As far as I know, I don't like any particular guy in that way right now. I need a therapist some days. Gah.

Anyhow, I've been reading "The Idylls of the King" by Alfred Lord Tennyson. Interesting literature. Two points: a good metaphor never dies. Seriously. His writing is over a hundred years old and the images still are brilliant. Way to go Alfred!
Second: Everyone in the stories is so passionate. About anything. Just like emotional whack jobs. All over the place all the time. In one poem, a girl dies because she is in love with Lancelot, but he doesn't love her back. He's actually in love with the queen, who is married to king arthur, and he is totally clueless. Seriously buddy! They have secret rendezvous (is that plural?) all the time and just sit around making eyes at each other, and all this stuff. PAY ATTENTION! This girl who was in love with Lancelot and died was supposedly ridiculously beautiful, and he was like "Nope. I'm faithful." Which brings me to a nice new thought. I rather like it.

In this story, Guinevere and Lancelot are faithful in their love. Wonderful, congrats, happy for you. But Guinevere is kinda married. So now what? This sort of thing happens all the time in modern culture. People get married and then "fall in love" with someone else. The marriage ends poopily, and then the people in love can never truly trust each other, because hey, they cheated once before, why not again!

So what's more important? The "true love"? Or the commitment to be faithful to your spouse until death or worse? I'm actually on the side of commitment. And a lot of people will argue with me. Yah, I know, love is intensely awesome, and it makes one feel like rainbows and leprechauns, but it's still a feeling. One one hand. The other sort of love is a virtue, which is much better all around. That's the kind of love we can aquire and learn through careful examining and refining of our motives and goals. And I think that the feeling of love is like all the other feelings of anger and sadness and what not. It blows over, it goes away. You lose the energy for it. But love as a virtue is just like the other virtues of honesty and perseverence. You can work at them, and once instilled, they last. And everyone agrees that they're good.

So here's the summary: Guinevere was wrong to give into emotional pulls for Lancelot, and Lancelot was wrong to coax her out of her relationship with Arthur, because Arthur honoured him and trusted him. What kind of friend is that. Manskank. But Guinevere was worse.

All you need is love
But one should be very specific about the type of love.

Thanks to Bertrand Russel and Mr. Reid for some of that, and Alfred Lord Tennyson for some.

Oh! And here's my quote of the day from the Very Secret Diary of Gollum.
"V. cold on top of Caradhras. Everyone wants to carry Frodo up mountain. Nobody wants to carry me up mountain. Stowed away in Legolas’ backpack but excessive nancing was not good for stomach. Have been sick all over elf collection of hair care products. Hope he does not notice."

Follow the link from last post to read all of it. Just like Wonka's Whipplescrumptious Fudgemallow Delight!

Tuesday, July 29, 2008

Assorted

I decided I would get my blogging in early and go to bed in reasonable time tonight. Go me!
So this weekend was interesting. Went to Canada's Wonderland with a friend's youth group. It was less than awesome actually. Didn't really do all the stuff I wanted cuz of the way large groups work. I will delve into that a bit more later.
Sunday... what did I do sunday? Ooh yes! I went with a couple of buddies to visit a girlfriend at her place of work, and then went and played mind games at a buddy's house. Literally just played cool games for like hours.
Yesterday I was late for work. I slept in because I was out till like midnight playing silly mind games. But I went to see the Batman movie after, which inspired some thoughts.
First, I'm gonna say that as a movie on the whole, it was less than satisfactory. I'm not into the whole idea of heroes, and I have no appreciation for 1/2 hour long fight scenes, no matter how epic.
But there was one bit that stood out brilliantly in this messy movie. One genius. One character.
Of course I mean the Joker. I commend Heath Ledger's performance sincerely. He was a sensation. Mind you, it was a freezing cold, terrifying sensation, but one felt it incredibly. Well done! Mr. Ledger reinvented his image in this film; I like him less, but respect him more.
Unfortunately, my praise falls on dead ears. And I can't help but wonder: did the Joker have anything to do with his suicide? The Joker was probably the most honest portrayal of a delusional sociopath that I've ever encountered. Mr. Ledger was known for throwing himself entirely into roles, and the role of the Joker even caused Jack Nicholson issues. I just can't help but wonder and feel sorry that the world is short that much potential.

One the way home, my buddy the Criminal and I had a deepish talk about what we would do if we had one act without any consequences. I would tell my mother off. I would let her know that I am a person in my own right. So there.
The Criminal said he would kill someone. I doubt his sincerity. Sorry my friend, if you read this, but I do. I have more faith in you than that. I mean, everyone has the potential to kill a person, or to be evil. But Criminal is good, you know? He generally cares about people, and is a very nice guy (yes I said nice. and that is precisely the word I want. Look it up) in spite of the crazy (awesome) music and unorthodox appearance.

And I decided that if I knew the world would end tomorrow, I would bag off work and ride my horse. Sorry mom, no family time!

Today I went out for coffee with a friend. Terriffic times at Perk's. In spite of a crazy mother moment. She called the shop and asked for me.... wheird. I love hanging out and talking with people. There are only a few people I do that with regularly, but it's one of my favourite things to do. It's refreshing. More than iced tea, which, although it is not a juice, is bloody good!

I also watched WALL-E this weekend. SOOOOO CUTE!!! I loved it, and will buy it, I believe.

I want to avoid the emo fellow, but he attacks at most unexpected moments. I love you, buddy, but I'm attempting to be an optimist until I get over my fear of school. Cheer up.

And go to this link: http://www.ealasaid.com/misc/vsd/ . Funniest thing I've read in forever. Hehe, "nancing"!

Saturday, July 26, 2008

Un Jour Fantastique.

It should be noted that I'm posting after midnight. So it was friday that was terriffic. Anyway. Do let me explain
Woke up late in the morning with the sunshine in my room. The only thing I would have improved would be to have someone making me bacon. NEvertheless, I took my shower, ate breakfast, and lazed aroud till about 12 when I went to the barn.
Jem and I had a great ride. The longest one we've had since a long time.
And then I went to work, which wasn't too bad in relation to some shifts.
And then my parents forgot about me, so I walked home. My mom apparently drove all over looking for me, but i had walked on the trail, so that was useless. I told her I was angry, but I wasn't really. It was a good walk to think by myself and talk and sing out loud and just be generally eccentric.
Anyhow, I were thinking today
DO I have a like a sign on my forehead that invites people with issues to spew on me?
Cuz it happens all the time. Like I said to a friend, some people meet me and they're seriously like "Hi, nice to meet you, becca. *spew life story and issues*."
Have you read the book fifth business? if not, do so. incredibly fun. There is a concept introduced there of a person not being the main character of their own life. DOes that make sense? They feel and other people feel that they just can't be the focus of their story.
I think I'm a bit like that. Not all, just a bit. But people sense it and are like, "Ooh, wait, this means I can be the main character in her life for a bit. Ahahahaha!" and then they spew and rather screw with my emotions and thus are more the center of my life than I am.
It's kinda annoying, but I don't think I'll ever stop just caring about people. Seriously, I will meet a person once, they will tell me they're clinically depressed, and I'll be upset for a week even though I don't even know them. Heart on sleeve case. I resent that. Oh well.

Friday, July 25, 2008

A strange conversation

But for one man, my day would have been poop.
I was stuck in a factory thinking about my suicidal friend for 8 hours on a beautiful day. I had a doctor's appointment (and I'm healthy, which is annoying to someone who hopes to die young).I didn't go to the barn.
But while at the Driftwood Center in Kitchener,waiting for the doctor, my mom and I went into this little Caribbean specialty store to look at stuff. The guy there was pretty big, with salt and pepper facial hair, and a weird scar on his right cheek, and an inability to make eye contact.
As soon as we entered the store he welcomed us like it was his home or something. A conversation was struck up, and it came up that I went to Africa. And he was so happy to heard it. So he talked about what he thought about North American consumerist culture.
He said that when he was in Guyana, his home country, he had never been rich. He and his family had enough to live and go to school and they had a car, but they weren't rich. But he said they were happy, and that the poorest people around them were happy with what they had.
And he and I talked about how ridiculous American culture is with its constant craving for more stuff. Third world cultures are often far more focused on relationships, because they can't afford to be attached to stuff. And we talked about how going to a third word country gives one a broader understanding of the world.
It was splendid, that experience. To meet someone so randomly that thinks about cultures the same way I do. And from how he talked, I kind of sensed he was a deep person, He wasn't fluent in English, and had a thick accent, but it felt like what he was saying came from a conviction and belief that the African and Latin cultures are superior to North American ones. He seemed genuinely perturbed that no matter how much stuff a soccer mom has, she will still be pissy.
And I was really glad to meet this fellow.
And I want to move to Rwanda or Jamaica.
And I want to know how my buddy from yesterday is doing.
And I want desperately to sleep.

I'm so glad I met that fellow. You have no idea. He's my person of the week.

Thursday, July 24, 2008

More Notes on Living

I decided today at work that I was too ridiculously tired to stay up till ludicrous hours of the night to blog after I'd done everything else. Generally if I do my thinking right now, it doesn't fit into the theoretical parameters for blog content.
So I did my thinking at work, and came up with and interesting start to what is potentially my best theory this week.
Here we go.
Numbers are pretty common things. They give things order, space, value, pattern, or clarity.
All numbers are either even or odd. Except imaginary or irrational numbers which I am not including as factors in this general statement.
Even numbers are very nice. Divisible by 2, neat, predictable, and seen everywhere in organic structures (ie: 2 eyes, 2 ears, 2 kidneys, and ruminants have 4 stomachs). Some ideas that surround even numbers are symmetry, mirrors, and most animals are symmetrical and breed in pairs. I thought today about the symbolic impact of even numbers. Noah's animals came 2 by 2. A day has 24 hours. The inherent symmetrical patterns of nature make me feel as though even numbers - the idea of balance - are organic. Everything animalian or botanic seeks a counterpart. And that is good and right and it's quite lovely to realize.

But if even numbers are good, then odd numbers are correct. The number three is so blunt and triangular. Have you ever seen a healthy animal with 3 legs? No. There is something about odd numbers which make them more like mathematical entities than organic patterns. True, we have 5 fingers on each hand. But the twon hands together make 10. I love how all modern humeracy and patterning and measuring is based on the number of fingers we have. It says to me that the very form of our bodies has influenced history. Stupendous eh? What if we had 9 fingers? or 11? Trippy...
Back on topic: Odd numbers are the basis of many mathematical and geometric patterns. Aren't triangles stupendous? Especially equilaterals! I don't know how to explain how brilliant triangles are to me, but ther it is; I love them. Isn't it amazing that 2 triangles fit together to make a star?

So it's something I'm going to be thinking about for the the next bit. The patterns that nature has created, and the effects it has on human thought and history.

I don't know why I feel so passionately about numercy tonight. My math teacher would be shocked after the amount of slacking i did in that class....

I am in the midst of being transported back to grade 10. A person I am aquainted with but that I don't much know has just told me they're a cutter/ anorexic. You know that feeling when a good mood drops out from underneath you like Drop Zone? yeah...

Wednesday, July 23, 2008

Day is done, gone the sun

Do you know that song? isn't it called "taps" or something? I'm going to look up all the words, cuz I think I only know a bit of them.

Here:

Day is done, gone the sun,
From the lake, from the hills, from the sky;
All is well, safely rest, God is nigh.

That's the first verse. And that's how I'm chilling right now. Today is finished. No more errands to run for my mother, no more places to drive my little sister, no more discussions to have with my father; the last skid is packed and the floor is clean. I had a nice conversation at timmy's with my chocolate milk and tea biscuit. The car is parked, the lights are off, the door is locked, the kitchen is clean. The last contact on my MSN list has signed off. All my emails and fb messages are replied to and the blogs I follow are read and commented on.

And yet something hangs with me; I want to accomplish something with my day. I want to have something to say to make this day matter. A day shouldn't be a list of things to do. My mom always says to not fight with her, she's just trying to survive. I survived today, and I didn't much enjoy it. If the point of every day is to survive; if the point is to accomplish a certain set of activities so that one can have money to eat and replicate; then I say screw it.

If all life is just survival, then I have no will to live. I was outdoors today for a very short amount of time, but I feel like nature tells me that it's not just survival. Nature is extravagant. It didn't need to be beautiful to survive. So I know there is more than survival; there is life. And that is what I want. Life. Experiences that expand my mind.

If Darwin was right, I'm not going to work tomorrow.

*deep breath, regain complacency*

In my attempt to live, I will now go lie on my lawn in the rain and dark. Day is done, and gone the sun, but I still want to live today.

Monday, July 21, 2008

Wet Underpants and new similies

So I went out to the barn around noon and took my time getting Jemma ready. I've been doing lately. Taking my time to spend with her instead of just getting there, riding, and leaving. I'm gonna miss her when I leave for school. I pretty much ooze all of my excess emotional stuff onto her so that the reast of the world doesn't get explosiona from me.
Anyway, at like 1230, when I was ready to go, it started to rain. And by rain I mean I could almost swim through the air, it was that thick. So I hung out at the barn a bit more, gave Jemma some hay, scratched her ears and whatnot. At about 1 it slowed down so it was just kinda drippy. So we went out and into the forest. And the trees were all drippy so I got wet because Jem kept running under them :P.
So we took the road home and the sun came out and we were both more or less dry by the time we were about 100 m away from the barn. By the time we were in the barn we were soaking because it started to pour again. I was faintly annoyed, but thought it was funny also.

So I went to Timmy's. I got an iced cap and a doughnut and sat in the sunshine reading a book and snacking until i was mostly dried off. It was irrationally pleasant.
And then I went to work with wet underwear and damp pants, which made for an uncomfortable evening.

But the evening made for considerable thought.
I was thinking about church and religion. Specifically music in church. And for a long time it's bothered me, because all the songs are just the same phrases put into different patterns. I crave something new. It's not like they can have run out of subject matter.He is new every morning. So why are all these songs the bloody same.
So I spent my time seeing if I could come up with better similies/metaphors to be used in a prospective worship song.
And it went pretty well, and made me happy, and if I ever have the initiatie I will go about writing that song and I will sell it to Hillsong for a couple grand and be able to eat at university.

Huzzah for simlies!

Sunday, July 20, 2008

My day has been whack.
I really enjoyed church this morning. I don't usually. It's usually just ok. But the talker said some interesting stuff. "We are immortal until our purpose is complete."
Isn't that a strange but interesting thing to think? I'm immortal until I've fulfilled my life. It's a little relieving, cuz that means I don't ever hafta have regrets, you know?
I believe I will adopt that philosophy. and when I die, don't worry, it was time.
It made me feel so much better after some crazy events in the morning. That and the rain drumming on the roof of the chapel.
I got in an argument with someone I don't know shortly thereafter
I got in an argument with my parents shortly thereafter
Does fighting make you feel absolutely horrible? I hate it. I mean, I won't back down from something I believe in, and I love a good debate or fist fight. But when people make you feel like crap when you're juss trying to splash your way through life without getting anyone wet, it's so frustrating.
I'm not trying to start anything, really. I'll stick happily to my puddles. I seriously feel like I was out puddle jumping and someone ran up beside me on purpose as I was happily hopping into one and got mad at me because they got wet. Just go away and we'll both be happy. I wish you all the happiness in the sunshine, but leave me alone in the puddles. Ergh.

Going out tonight to see Hancock I think. Should be glorious!

Ahaha, raaain

I can feel the sound of the rain pouring into my mind and washing out all of it.
All the anger and resentment and frustration and grime of the past week is replaced by a soothing coolness.
A cool drumming; steady but random, constant but not consistent. And when I close my eyes, the tired burning slowly diminishes as my tears, like the rain, clean out the fatigue and negativity.
All that heat is gone and I'm cool. Cool and sloshy and pleasantly refreshed by the rain.


It's gone now and I rather miss it. I can feel the tension tingle into my shoulders. 

But I'm better than this. I can lean back and let my mind make its own rain. "Easy now. Hush, love, hush"

Just as an interesting note, this is my first post from my laptop! So exciting! Today I went shopping for university stuff with my roomie, and I added a whole bunch of my suite-mates to my facebook. Pretty kool, I say.

There's one guy named Richard  Palmateer. My roomie and I call him Richard William Palmateer the Third with a british accent. It's our version of fun. 

Alright, cheerio. "Listen to the rhythm of the falling rain"

Thursday, July 17, 2008

I'm having one of those weeks

I believe I am going quite clinically insane

Wait, PMS... we're all good!

Wednesday, July 16, 2008

My System

I just thought about this today at the factory:
I judge people based on their hands.
Yah, I know I shouldn't judge people, but really, we all need to judge people: decide whether or not we like them, see if we want to recieve influence from them.
So, I judge people on their hands.
And it works pretty well. If I don't like a person's hands, I probably won't get along too well with them. I'm not sure whether this is a cause and effect scenario...
I have one friend whose hands gross me out so much that I need to mentally block myself from looking at them.
Anyway, that was my thought of the day. Is there something physical or otherwise that you judge people based on?

Cyanide and Happiness and Happiness

http://explosm.net/comics/1342/
http://explosm.net/comics/1337/
http://explosm.net/comics/1333/
http://explosm.net/comics/1335/
http://explosm.net/comics/1328/
http://explosm.net/comics/727/
http://explosm.net/comics/373/

A couple interesting ones. Enjoy...

Sunday, July 13, 2008

This weekend

I was dog sitting. Not too bad a job, but I really spent like 2 days watching television. there was seriously nothing else to do. I played with the dog and let it out for walks and stuff, but mostly it just sat around the house but i wasn't supposed to leave too much. And they had nmo good books. So yah, television. Too much, really. I was lying in bed last night trying to fall asleep and just images and characters kept shapeshifting through my mind. It was very psychadellic. Just like one minute Jim Carrey is sitting there and petting a cat in a house and then he morphs into a space shuttle and blasts through the top of the house and the cat gets angry and turns into that comedian guy that was on and starts singing spirituals and then turns into a gorilla in a jungle but the trees are really a studio audience. That wasn't necessarily what I remember, but it gives a picture of what it was like. I couldn't fall asleep for a loong time because of that. And the dog started just barking like crazy at like 1 am. And again at like 7. Bleh

So I wrote that bit on monday. And now it's tuesday and I feel different
I'm develloping rage issues.
I want to move out.
Less than 50 days, hooray.


On a lighter note, I saw someone today I thought I wouldn't ever see again. And it was... a strange sensation. Y'all prolly know of whom I mention. I was happy to see this person, really. But circumstances have changed so much from last time that now it seems like they're a new aquaintance.

Also, I really wish I was going to camp this year. It was one of those places and times that I always felt at home and comfortable. I could manage being around people 24/7 without blowing a circuit, which is what generally happens. Yah, if I am around people to much I just get tired and grumpy because I hafta be nice. I dunno, it's a real stretcher often to just be civil to people when all you want is to just lock your self in a dark room with your iPod and not hafta retain any sort of form that people generally like you to assume.

And I've come to a conclusion about relationships. Any guy I eventually prospectively end up with has to be entirely happy to let me have at least 2 hours to myself every day. I don't care how much I like hanging out with him, I need to have alone time. Not even to think, really, just so I don't hafta be nice to anyone.

Bahaha.

I've reverted into the type of blogging that a certain friend of a friend is well known for.
"My middle-class life is a black abyss, and nobody looovees meeeee *Sigh*"
Well, I'm exaggerating.
But I apologize for the descent into puddle-of-mush mind workings.
One of those days.
But it was splendid out eh? I really wish I wasn't so physically tired everyday coming home from work. Today I stopped on my bike ride home and just laid on the grass and took a doze. I didn't fall asleep, but I felt very relaxed. Eventually i got creeped out by the bugs crawling onto me, so I got up.
But it was a verr nice day.

Cheers, all. "May your iPod's doom seed never sprout." - Modern Proverb

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TYq0A8zsrCk

Wednesday, July 9, 2008

Because of the Sunshine

When you spend eight hours in a factory
Everything gets dirty and grimy
Your pants, your hair, your brain
Not that you get potty-brain
More like your thoughts get stiff and can't move around, and just need to be flushed out
And your head needs to be refilled

I was biking home this afternoon, and it was beautiful
Sunshine and wind and flowers
The thing that mostly was refreshing was the smell
From under me there rose this hot, earthy breath
Warm vegetation and dirt
On the wind there was a strange hint at gooseberries, which sent my mind back to my childhood.

I stopped at a metal bridge on the trail and leaned against the railing to just breathe and think and almost snooze.
Under my arms was the smell of hot rust, and under that was the smell of stream: wet, mucky, and a little fishy.
And I leaned and let the wind run over me and the smell flushed out the factory from my lungs and the sun scrubbed out my eyes and let me see how bright the world is.
I can't explain how much I love nature. When I'm outside on a sunny day, I sometimes think I'm going to just explode with happiness.
I just want to lie down and be warm and happy in nature's pomp and frivolity.
I don't know what I'm saying anymore, because I have no idea how to say what it is.
Euphoria?
Joy?
Rapture?
Excitement?
They don't fit.

Bah.

I read one of the best pieces of book I've ever come across today.
As a bit of background, the book "What's Wrong With the World" by G.K. Chesterton is just him ranting about how men want their own property, and women should stay at home and not vote, and that education is weird. Basically, he wants to bring down the idea that if we don't like society, we should learn to adapt to it. He wants society and culture and whatnot to fit humanity, not vice versa. Makes sense...
Anyhow, here it is, my favourite bit of the book, from the very end:

Now the whole parable and purpose of these last pages, and indeed of all these pages, is this: to assert that we must instantly begin all over again, and begin at the other end. I begin with a little girl's hair. That I know is a good thing at any rate. Whatever else is evil, the pride of a good mother in the beauty of her daughter is good. t is one of those adamantine tendernesses which are the touchstones of every age and race. If other things are against it, other things must go down. If landlords and laws and sciences are against it, then landlords and laws and sciences must go down. With the red hair of one she-urchin in the gutter I will set fire to all modern civilization. Because a girl should have long hair, she should have clean hair; because she should have clean hair, she should not have an unclean home; because she should not have an unclean home, she should have a free and leisured mother; because she should have a free mother, there should not be a usurious landlord; because there should not be a usurious landlord, there should be a redistribution of property; because there should be a redistribution of property, there shall be a revolution. That little urchin with the gold-red hair, whom I have just watched toddling past my house, she shall not be lopped and lamed and altered; her hair shall not be cut short like a convict's; no, all the kingdoms of earth shall be hacked about and mutilated to suit her. She is the human and sacred image; all around her the social fabric shall sway and split and fall; the pillars of society shall be shaken, and the roofs of ages come rushing down; and not one hair of her head shall be harmed.


Ok , so my thought on that bit. First, a lot of semicolons! And possibly one of the longest sentences known to man. But I agree with the point of it. People should not change so that they can fit into a social form. The social form should be moulded around what is good and natural for a human. Does any other way make sense? Not really, no. He did go a bit Martin Luther King at the end there eh? But as the closing bit of a very thought-provoking book, I enjoyed it verr much. I also like the clarity of metaphor and thought that he has. Props.

Tuesday, July 8, 2008

Un jour

So the past two days have been nuts.
Yesterday, I went to work, biked to the barn, helped bale hay, came home, showered, slept.
I love baling hay usually, but it was about 45 degeers, humid, and dustly in the hay loft, and I had a headache, so it was minorly unpleasant.
Today, I went to work. And I was assigned to work with thie guy named Ken. As I have been saying to a lot of people, I want to sack him in every sense of the term. As in, kick him in the balls, stuff him in a bag and beat him with a stick, and fire him. He is under the impression that if I were to touch anything other than the completely packaged bags of pet food, it would turn to ash and crumble away. Basicly he wouldn't let me touch a thing all day when I know how to operate everything. It was intensely provoking. Odds are 5:1 that I'm significantly smarter than him. Yes, I'm a girl, and yes, I'm a teenager, and yes, you've worked here 2 weeks longer than me, but I believe I have the ability to do my job satisfactorily. *screams, tears out hair*

On the upside, AAH is outside my house cutting the lawn. AAH is our newly composed acronym for Attractive Artistic Hunk, who used to be known as Awesome Hott Guy, but AHG is a crappy acronym. Amalie and I have a number of other interesting acronyms for guys in our aquaintance, which I will share.
ACM: awesome cool musician
NBS: naughty bi-stallion
There's the CCRB, but I can't remember what it stands for...something about cool and ripped.
Andyway, that is how I pass my time when I have too much.

Saturday, July 5, 2008

The Road Trip

I believe I have outdone myself as far as evening entertainment.
I have never stayed out all night and done so much with 4 friends and half a tank of gas. I will relate the whole evening to you as clearly as possible. I will eliminate code names for the present.
At work, Calvin and I proposed a road trip to visit our friend Biye who is at a smart person summer program at McMaster University in Hamilton. Upon reaching home, we coordinated a vehicle and 3 other people: Emily, Roland, and Porky (that's not even a code name really).
Emily was taking care of her horse, and was to be at my house at 8ish, and we were going to collect the guys and set out. We planned to find Biye about 1030 maybe, chat, and leave.
Emily showed up about 45 minutes late. Apparently she had to help birth kittens.
That was ok, really, we were just gonna have to speed things up. I was going through a couple little suburban streets in my minivan with her on our way to pick up the guys. I had just accelerated to about 70km/h and Emily screamed "STOP SIGN!" and I realised I was about to run it.
Of course, I slammed on the brakes. My minivan's wheels locked up, and we started fishtailing through the intersection in a four-wheel skid. About halfway through I thought "Screw it" and just kept going.
By this point Emily and I had the hiccups and were both insanely hyper. We got Roland at his house and Porky and Calvin at Porky's, and left for Hamilton.
Seriously, getting to Hamilton isn't too hard. Just follow the signs really, and make enough Timmy's stops. We got there about 10. And we thought it wouldn't be too hard to find McMaster because hey, it's a university. Everyone will know where it is.
An hour, a bathroom break, 3 direction-askings, and much frustrating wandering later, we finally found it.
From thence it took half an hour to find the right building and another half hour to break in (it was locked up) so when we finally got close to Biye it was around midnight. The building was a university residence where you hafta get someone in the building to buzz open the door for you. We didn't know which room Biye was in, so we hung around until someone was going in/out and then just got them to let us in. We took the elevator up, hoping to find someone in a common area and ask for Biye.
We wandered around the building a bit, and came across a man with a binder who looked rather shocked to see us. We asked f her was with the smart person program, and he said yes. We asked for Biye and he said everyone was sleeping. A lady with a guitar happened along and listened to us ask for Biye and just out of the blue asked if we were his friends who made soap cookies. We were very shocked to find she knew this about us, but we conceded it.
Apparently our Biye had made a speech detailing some of our extravagant past adventures. She asked us about setting things on fire, and we pointed at Porky. She asked us about running around screaming for a minute straight, and Emily and I started laughing. So Biye had pre-introduced us.
We couldn't see him, so we left a note about how much we loved him and saying that Emily was keeping the baby (there isn't one, just to clarify), and the guy with the binder said that Biye would have to read it in front of all the smart people, which made us exceedingly pleased.
Oh, and somewhere in there we told them how we got in and they looked, I must say, a little scared....hehehe.

So we headed out of Hamilton. Well we tried anyway. Got lost again. But eventually the 401 came to us and we ended up back at Elmira Tim Horton's for sustenance. Then we remembered that our buddies Micheal and Colton were staying at long-lost-buddy Pip's place in Mount Forest area. Porky had been there before and thought he could recognize it. So we stopped at Roland's house to find vague directions and headed out there.
The way to Mount Forest, like Hamilton, is simple. Go North out of Elmira, turn right, turn left. But here are the facts we speculated about Pip's house's location: Near, but not in, a small town called Holstein; on a gravel road; the numbers 1 and 4 in the fire number; trees on the right-hand side of the drive; and there was a creek in the vicinity.
It took us less time to find it than to find McMaster. After carefully checking out a whack of farms on dirt roads, we spied Colton's van, and joyfully drove up.
Then the dog started barking. We didn't want to wake up Pip's family, because that is impolite. Porky scouted around and tried to find them stealthily with no luck. After sitting annoyed and indecisive, we decided to leave and let the family sleep.
We noticed while at Pip's the intensely bright stars. So we were trying to find a decent field to stargaze in, but they were all wet. Eventually we parked on the side of the road and the whole pack of us lay down on the pavement and looked up and talked about life, the universe, and everything. It was really crazy to see the sky so starry. I could see the milky way, which I haven't seen for a long time. I felt like I was back into a place where I was supposed to be; it was like someone set up a pretty blanket over me and was saying "It's ok, you're home here."
Anyway, we headed back to Elmira. We saw a gas station that was under 1.30/litre and stopped to fill up. We tried to calculate who owed who what $, but it was 4 am, and just was not working.
I went in to pay, and I literally stumbled into the store. There was an unexpected lip on the door step, and so I made quite an entrance. I looked up laughing at myself to discover a nice looking boy behind the counter also laughing in a good natured type of way. I engaged in conversation, and we exchanged notes on drunk people (verbal notes). And it was a strange experience, because after I left, I felt like I should know him. Like, he was so happy and friendly seeming that I really wanted to hang out with him. And I've been thinking about it a lot since... all 6 hours since.
*Sigh*
So we went back to Elmira, but no one wanted to go home. We could see the sun beginning to rise, and we decided to collect blankets from Porky's house and go watch the sunrise on the swings at Lion's Park. We arrived and there was a police car sitting in the parking lot. We decided screw it, we're going to hang out on the swings anyway.
It must have been very entertaining for the cop to watch 5 teenagers fit themselves onto a little basket swing comfortably. All of us were cold and none of use could breath quite right, but we were happy all balled up like kittens and chatting merrily.
530 rolled around and we decided to call it a night (or day, whatever) and the guys got placed at their homes and Emily and I returned to my house.
My mother was up to see my brother off to camp and she was not happy I had stayed up all night. Notice she doesn't mind the staying out, but she doesn't like the staying up. I'm apparently bipolar.
So Emily and I went to breakfast at Elmira Doughnuts and Deli, which felt good and wholesome and yummy.
We came to my house again and dozed while watching the matrix, and Emily left about 930.

So that was my night. It was active and happy and spent with friends. I wouldn't have done it any other way. Except maybe asking for that guy's email address... hmm... road trip next weekend?
Porky's mom showed up at my house for the garden tour this morning and asked me why she heard him come in at quarter to six. I said we got lost in Hamilton and then in Mount Forest. She looked shocked and laughed.

I encourage anyone who has stuff to add that I missed, because everything is a little foggy.

Cheers to a good Friday night!

Friday, July 4, 2008

Oh yah

I forgot
The weather today was mind bogglingly beautiful! Go outside.
NOW!!!

Childhood Favourites

I was on forums for the University of Guelph people starting next year, and there was a thread on what your favourite books were as a child. Here is my post:

Ooh, books. When I was a kid, my parents thought i was going to be an athlete until age four when I learned to read and became a nerd through and through. My favourite stories as a kid are ones my dad read to me and then I would read over and over again by myself.

The Chronicles of Narnia: Read most of them dozens of times (still read them) and the last one only once, because it made me so sad

CHarlottes Web: cried every time

The Egypt Game: I even bought it for my little sister

The Hobbit: When my dad read it to me at age 5, it scared the schnitzel out of me, but I've read it many times and I looove the poetry and adventure

The Lord of the Rings: Did anyone else have parents who read you stories like this when you were 7 or so?

A Wrinkle in Time: I stayed up all night to read it. First book that I did that for, and now it's a habit.

Hans Christian Anderson Fairytales: My grandma gave me a beautiful book of them

The Shy Steggosaurus of Cricket Creek: It's not well known, it's 60's pulp fiction, but it still makes me cry.

Calvin and Hobbes!!!

I can go on forever. I don't know how I'm going to leave my family books here next year...They might mysteriously migrate to my room over the course of the year... how strange :S

I don't think I've ever thought about how much these books influenced me. When I was a kid and I was angry or sad or just couldn't deal with being a loser anymore, I would pick up one of these books, or any book. And then I could let go.
I had adventures
I had friends
I was in a totally different world, and that world let me sit and listen and watch. It told me secrets and let me tag along.
When my siblings wouldn't speak to me, Peter, Susan, Edmond, and Lucy would. Well not so much Susan, but that's a long story.
When I felt like a freak because I couldn't fit my mind into the forms my school and religion told me I had to, Meg and Charles Wallace told me that I was better off than them.
That's what books were to me.

Here's some more of the books that I have personal attachments to:

Invitation to Short Stories: All around good book, beautiful little stories that make me laugh and cry
The Chrysalids: So grade 9 isn't my childhood, but it was thrilling anyway
The Cosmic Trilogy by C.S.Lewis
Ella Enchanted: I know I've mentioned this before, but it's one of those books that was almost more real to me than reality
Jane Eyre: I think the fact that this book is in first person is what makes it so attractive. I think the book is now chemically bonded to my mind.


So anyway, ROAD TRIP TONIGHT!
YEEEEHAAAAAA

Wednesday, July 2, 2008

What I've Been Thinking Lately

Strangely voiced well voiced by Bob Dylan.

The Times They Are A-Changing

Come gather 'round people
Wherever you roam
And admit that the waters
Around you have grown
And accept it that soon
You'll be drenched to the bone.
If your time to youIs worth savin'
Then you better start swimmin'
Or you'll sink like a stone
For the times they are a-changin'.

Come writers and critics
Who prophesize with your pen
And keep your eyes wide
The chance won't come again
And don't speak too soon
For the wheel's still in spin
And there's no tellin' who
That it's namin'.
For the loser now
Will be later to win
For the times they are a-changin'.

Come senators, congressmen
Please heed the call
Don't stand in the doorway
Don't block up the hall
For he that gets hurt
Will be he who has stalled
There's a battle outside
And it is ragin'.
It'll soon shake your windows
And rattle your walls
For the times they are a-changin'.

Come mothers and fathers
Throughout the land
And don't criticize
What you can't understand
Your sons and your daughters
Are beyond your command
Your old road is
Rapidly agin'.
Please get out of the new one
If you can't lend your hand
For the times they are a-changin'.

The line it is drawn
The curse it is cast
The slow one now
Will later be fast
As the present now
Will later be past
The order is
Rapidly fadin'.
And the first one now
Will later be last
For the times they are a-changin'.

So me again: time goes too fast.
And it makes me sad to think about it at all.
Sad to the most inside of me.
Becasue I won't get back those 8 hours I spent in a factory today.
And the change is sad too.
One day I will look bewilderedly at the speed of technology and wonder where my ability to keep up went. My poor bolg will be waaay outdated.
Yah, the sad thing about nature is that inability to change means death.
ARG!
I'm all over the place tonight.
Stupid song. Why can't I just play the gitaur and harmonica and sing soulful lyrics and become wildly famous?

Cuz the times have a-changed.

My job

I really like it, actually. I mean, I'm dead tired and my feet hurt by the end, but I get to think about whatever I like
If I want to sing the musical Sweeny Todd in my head, I can.
If I want to talk to myself in French, I can
If I want to throw stuff at people...I can't
*sigh*
I can not now remain in my house for more than two concious hours and be sane.

Tuesday, July 1, 2008

Motherhood Manual

So you would like to be a mother? Here are some easy and foolproof steps to being Becca's!
1: Ignore anything that is remotely logical. This will help you win arguments becasue everything that your child says will fail to penetrate and change your mind
2: Become flambouyantly emotional. It makes everyone around you uncomfortable, so they will be more likely to listen to you. It is helpful if you can blame this on a health problem.
3: Make all decisions arbitrarily. If your child asks for a reason or explanation, hedge the question or attack their audacity for asking.

She's not really that bad, but some days...

In other news, today was my first day of full time work. I hurt from 8 hours of lifting and 2 hours of biking. Also, happy Canada Day!!!!

Fireworks!!!
Actually, a couple friends and I spent like $50 on them yesterday. Very many adventures ensued, and one can read about them on my buddy's blog: http://rolos-life.livejournal.com/2691.html
My fave part was Colgate and the Criminal nearly getting exploded :D:D.

The ranting about mothers is mostly becasue I now have a 10:30 bedtime because she wants my to get accostomed to sleeping more for university. If anyone can tell me how that makes any bloody sense at all, please tell me.... grr....