Sunday, March 30, 2008

Bottomless Pit of Brain

Doesn't your mind seem endless? It's really hard to find exactly where your brain leaves off and the rest of the universe begins. Today my brain hurts from driving to Huntsville and back. Sensory overload!
But the 4 hours in the car on the way home when my father was sleeping and reading the paper left plenty of time for thought. For someone who averages on about 30 TPM (thoughts per minute), 4 hours is a long time. Among long, random, thought trains into LaLa land, I thought about being a kid. Do you remember having a very dim idea of what the world was like? My dad and I sag a few songs that I used to sing a lot, and now that I understand the words, many things have changed. I used to just like the sounds, and I wouldn't have any idea of if or what the sentences meant. Also, I know so much more about people. I was a bratty little kid eh? I once told a girl bluntly that I didn't want to be her friend because I didn't think I would ever see her again. I think I was trying to show off to my friend at the time. Kids are strange because all they really think about in the world is their present, direct experience. Life is good if they're having fun at that specific moment in time. Their emotions are much more flexible, and they go from "Life is aaaa-maZing!" to "life is a bottomless pit of misery" in moments. They lack the capacity to analyze the reasons for their emotions, or to see outside their current state to think "things will get better" or "this is not how life always is". Being a kid is like living in a little box of a world, where there are occasional breaches from the outside world that keep it in touch with reality.
My mind has wandered off again, right in the middle of something that originally had a point.
Ooh, my mom is home. I will continue to think elsewhere.

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