Hands

I'm just not a fan of how today turned out. I went to KW to volunteer with the people I'm going to Rwanda with.
On one hand, I met a super cool guy there and we worked in the sound booth together.
On the other hand I'm likely not gonna see him again.

On one hand I did something nice for people, which makes me happy.
On the other hand it was horrible social awkwardness cuz we were just supposed to go talk to people and I just can't do that.

On one hand my older brother was baptised today.
On the other hand I didn't get to hang out for the after-party.

On one hand it was good to hang out with the people I'm supposed to travel 3/4 of the way around the world with.
On the other hand the super cool one isn't actually coming along anymore, and the rest of them think I'm dumb and weird.

I actually just feel like sitting down and crying for like the next 4 hours. Why do I have no frekken social skills? Honestly. I could do with being a lot less smart or something and then actually be able to talk to people or do something other than just sit and be awkward.

It's really just starting conversations. I need frekken lessons or something.

I think I might go for a walk tonight just to regain my mental centre of gravity.

Frik.